There is SO much to say, that hopefully it will all come out better than it is sitting all jumbled up in my heart and mind, with my snotty nose and tear stained face from tons of tears of joy this morning!
I don't even know where to start, except from as far back as possible, but as quickly as possible. 7 years ago this coming Sunday, March 8, will be 7 years since we felt our hearts ripped out of our chests and I held our daughter as she breathed her last breath. Unless you've lost a child, you can't imagine how that pain will change you. Thankfully, the Lord was faithful and restored our marriage and joy in Him, but it was a long road, as grieving roads naturally are. I'd be lying if I said that I never thought at times that we might ever smile again. That life would never seem to be joyful again. Then God worked mightily in our marriage, and made Josh and I closer than we had been before Tori was born and passed away. Then, He gave us Scarlet. A true ray of sunshine that we never expected! We thought that was it. God had truly been faithful in showing that our mourning would truly not stay mourning, that He would and did restore the lost years (Joel 2:25) and turn our weeping into joy again!
Fast forward 7 years later, and we have 3 children we have been blessed to have in our home for over a year now. They have become a part of our family, and we know no difference in our biological children and our non biological. We love them all the same. In the beginning, we prayed for restoration and hoped that their biological parents might change their lives, and a family could be restored and ultimately have Christ change their lives. As time went on, and multiple opportunities were given to this family in need, change just wasn't going to be the decision they would make. That's heartbreaking all around. We didn't desire to just take children from their mother, but unfortunately in foster care, you just see that restoration is not going to be the end result sometimes. That's why foster families who want to adopt are called by God to help these children who need a family so they won't age out of the system, never knowing a family to call their own. Thankfully, God has chosen us to be that family for these 3 precious blessings from the Lord!!!
There are a lot of legal terms and hoops to jump through when you're going through the termination of parental rights and adoption. To explain my reasoning for this post, I will have to explain a little bit of that big picture. To try and simplify it, rights were terminated by a local judge last summer for our kids. However, We have been waiting 8 long months for this appeal to come back from the state court. Although we were reassured time and time again that they couldn't see this appeal being overturned, I just had this apprehensive feeling that until it was finalized, I couldn't fully rest easy. Knowing the situation they came from, and sparing all the details, I wouldn't want my biologocal children to go live in that, and so I definitely couldn't see my non biological children returning to it either. It was more than just my attachment to them, it was pain for them to ever have to know anything other than the loving, safe family they know now. Again, I was reassured that this would probably never happen...
I began to pray, and asked a couple of my friends to pray with me, that MARCH would be the month. March is always such an emotional month for me, but after 8 long months of waiting, I just really began to pray, believing that the Lord could handle this and SOON. I hadn't been as faithful to pray and be specific in my prayers until recently. Oh me, of little faith. :( When you're diligently beseeching the Lord, your prayer life changes. Unconfessed sin was exposed to me, my lack of faith was even more exposed, and I began to see my lack of prayer through seeking the Lord for this answer. I don't know why the Lord laid March on my heart, and why I specifically asked my friends to pray about this, but I see now that the Lord doesn't HAVE to prove anything to me, but that He does love His children and that He DOES want to give us the desires of our hearts when we're seeking Him and His will.
I got a call first thing this morning that the state court had denied the appeal and the order was faxed over yesterday....Sunday, March FIRST. After my tears and it began to sink in and I realized yesterday's date, it was almost too much!! I praised the Lord with my husband, and just expressed how awesome this was of God to answer down.to.the.day, the very month that is always so painful for me. This is one of those moments that I will recall when we sing that song, "We Will Remember." Waiting on the Lord is not always my strong suit. Praying diligently about something on my heart and mind is unfortunately not what I always do. Let this be a testament to God's faithfulness, His ability to answer the prayers we pray, and that He is the ultimate Comforter and giver of all good things! These 3 children I pray with and tuck in every night are definitely very good gifts from the Lord above! We feel privileged and honored to be on the receiving end! Our hearts break for a family who won't be able to enjoy these good gifts, but we are thankful that the Lord was in control of their lives and the paths they should take. That He saw fit to show them grace and allow them to be adopted by a family who will teach them about Christ and His amazing grace. As Christians we have been adopted by Christ, taken from the old lives we were once a part of being dead to sin, and made NEW and alive in Christ...we were made HEIRS of Christ! These precious children will eventually bear our last name and become legal heirs of the Wilhoit family. That is such good news to this momma's heart!
We ask for your prayers in the months ahead. Many ask, what's next?! There's a lot of paperwork to be done, and I mean a lot. We hope to be done with that and file by the end of April. From there it will depend on several things of how long the finishing process takes...but we are told our social worker wants this to be moved FAST...so hopefully by summer at the latest, we will be able to finalize everything! I hope this all came out in somewhat order and that it made sense. I am so positively too happy to make much sense of things right now! :)
Praise the Lord and may He be glorified through this whole situation!!! Waiting upon the Lord, even for 7 years, is always best! Nothing or no one can replace our sweet Tori, but our joy could sure be restored, and it has been indeed!
